Asking for help is nerve-wracking. Admitting you can’t do everything yourself, that this disease has taken a toll, is a humbling experience. But living with rheumatoid arthritis often means asking for help in various ways. Over the years, I have had to learn how to ask for help, even when I don’t want to, but I know I need it.
The experience of reaching out for assistance can be daunting, as it forces you to confront your vulnerabilities and acknowledge the limitations imposed by your condition. Initially, the thought of being dependent on others filled me with anxiety and a sense of loss. I prided myself on my independence, but rheumatoid arthritis has a way of showing that needing help is not a sign of weakness.
Asking for help has taught me humility and grace. It has shown me the strength in vulnerability and the power of community. Over time, I have become more comfortable with seeking help. Whether it’s advice from medical professionals, support from friends and family, or joining support groups, asking f or help has become essential in my journey.
People with rheumatoid arthritis (RA) may need help for several reasons:
- Pain and Stiffness: Severe joint pain and stiffness can make it difficult to perform everyday tasks, such as opening jars, buttoning clothes, or even walking.
- Fatigue: Chronic fatigue is common in RA patients, leaving them feeling exhausted and needing assistance with household chores or errands.
- Limited Mobility: Swollen and painful joints can restrict movement, making it hard to reach, lift, or carry objects.
- Flare-Ups: During flare-ups, symptoms can worsen suddenly, requiring additional support to manage daily activities.
- Medical Management: Keeping track of medications, appointments, and treatments can be overwhelming, necessitating help with organization and reminders.
- Emotional Support: Living with a chronic condition can be emotionally taxing, and having someone to talk to or lean on can be invaluable for mental well-being.
- Adaptations and Modifications: Assistance may be needed to make home modifications or use adaptive devices to make daily life easier and safer.
- Transportation: Driving or using public transportation might be challenging during severe flare-ups or due to limited mobility, requiring help getting to appointments or running errands. I do not drive due to how severe my arthritis affects me.
Physical Help For Rheumatoid Arthritis
Sometimes, you need hands-on assistance. On bad days, even simple tasks can be overwhelming. You may need help with household chores, cooking, or running errands. You might require someone to drive you to appointments, or even assist with personal care when pain and fatigue are severe. Asking for physical help means admitting vulnerability, which can be difficult for those accustomed to independence.It can also create feelings of guilt.
Emotional Help With Rheumatoid Arthritis
Living with a chronic illness is emotionally taxing. The constant uncertainty, the anxiety over potential progression, the grief over lost abilities – it all takes a toll. You may need someone to listen, to validate your feelings, to offer words of encouragement. You might benefit from professional counseling to cope with the emotional burden of RA. Asking for emotional help requires opening yourself up, making yourself vulnerable, and trusting others with your inner struggles.
Financial Help When Dealing With Rheumatoid Arthritis
Rheumatoid arthritis can be costly. Between medications, doctor’s visits, and potentially needing to cut back on work, the financial strain can be significant. You may need help covering expenses, or assistance navigating the complex world of insurance and financial aid. Asking for financial help can be especially hard, as it touches on issues of pride and independence.
The Mixed Bag of Support for Rheumatoid Arthritis
Some people will rise to the occasion, offering help willingly and without judgement. Others, unfortunately, will not and we can’t pick and choose who’ll respond the way we hope for. They may not understand the nature of your illness, or they may not know how to help. Sometimes, those you expect to be there for you might fall short, while others provide unexpected support. Learning to accept help graciously, and to seek it from supportive people, is a skill when living with RA.
Finding Help for Rheumatoid Arthritis in Unexpected Places
Help can come from where you least expect it. An online community might become a lifeline, providing emotional support and practical advice. A neighbor or coworker might offer assistance with errands or chores. Even strangers, through crowdfunding or non-profits, might provide financial help. Keeping an open mind, and seeking help from all avenues, is crucial when navigating life with RA.
Asking for help with rheumatoid arthritis is challenging. It requires admitting vulnerability, opening yourself up, and seeking support in various ways. But with the right mindset, and a willingness to accept help, you can build a strong support network to aid you on your journey with this chronic disease.the key is to be clear and specific about what you need.
Supporting someone with rheumatoid arthritis (RA) can make a big difference in their quality of life.
Here are some ways to help, as well as things to avoid:
Ways to Support Someone with RA:
- Offer Practical Help: Assist with daily tasks like cooking, cleaning, or grocery shopping, especially on days when their symptoms are worse.
- Be Understanding: Listen to their needs and frustrations without judgment. Sometimes, just being there to listen can be incredibly supportive.
- Encourage Gentle Exercise: Suggest activities like walking, swimming, or yoga, which can help maintain joint flexibility and reduce pain.
- Help with Medical Appointments: Offer to accompany them to doctor visits or help them keep track of their medications and appointments.
- Stay Inclusive: Involve them in social activities and outings, but be flexible and understanding if they need to cancel or modify plans due to their condition.
- Educate Yourself: Learn about RA to better understand what they’re going through and how you can help.
Things to Avoid When Supporting Someone With Rheumatoid Arthritis:
- Minimize Their Pain: Avoid saying things like “it’s all in your head” or “you’re overreacting.” Their pain is real and valid.
- Push Them Too Hard: Don’t pressure them to do more than they’re comfortable with. Respect their limits and encourage rest when needed.
- Ignore Their Needs: Don’t dismiss their feelings or concerns. Acknowledge their struggles and offer support.
- Offer Unsolicited Advice: Unless asked, avoid giving advice on treatments or remedies. Let them make their own health decisions.
- Be Overbearing: While it’s important to offer help, don’t be too controlling or overprotective. Allow them to maintain their independence as much as possible.
Remember that living with RA is a journey that varies from person to person. Building a strong support network while maintaining independence where possible is key to managing this chronic condition effectively. Don’t hesitate to reach out for help—it’s a sign of strength, not weakness, to acknowledge when support is needed.
